Would we know how to talk if not for the movies? Of course we would. But we’d do it with far less style and panache. Quoting movies is a sort of shorthand, getting across volumes by only saying a few words. And when you find someone who gets the reference, well, that’s a shortcut too. A sort of litmus test that instantly indicates, yeah, we can be friends. 

In a thoroughly undemocratic, unscientific accumulation, we’ve gathered 25 of the movies with the best showing of biting, poetic, or otherwise memorable lines. Here are the most quotable movies, along with their best quotes.    

Anchorman (2004)

His voice may make a wolverine purr and his library may be filled with many leather-bound books, but Ron Burgundy isn’t down with change, especially in the form of a beautiful woman who thinks an “anchorlady” can read the news. 

• “I love lamp.” 
• “Dorothy Mantooth is a saint!” 
• “Ribs. I had ribs for lunch. That’s why I’m doing this.” 
• “There were horses and a man on fire and I killed a guy with a trident.”
• “I would like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party.”
• “Ok. No. I would not like to go to a party in your pants.”
• “It’s so damn hot. Milk was a bad choice.”
• “Stings the nostrils. In a good way.”
• “I tried to get an interview with him, but they said no, you can’t do that, he is a live bear, he will literally rip your face off.”
• “Ron Burgundy will read anything that is put on that teleprompter. And when I say anything, I mean a-ny-thin-guh.”
• “Boy. That escalated quickly. I mean that really got outta hand fast.”

The Big Lebowski (1998)

If someone said you were being “very undude right now,” you’d know what they meant. That’s the enduring legacy of the Coen brothers’ foray into film noir, complete with rugs and white Russians, nihilists and known pornographers. 

• “This is a very complicated case, Maude. You know, a lotta ins, a lotta outs, a lotta what-have-yous. And, uh, a lotta strands to keep in my head, man. Lot of strands in old Duder’s head.”
• “Yeah, we believe in nothing. We believe in nothing, Lebowski, nothing.”
• “Careful man, there’s a beverage here.”
• “Nobody fucks with the Jesus.”
• “Yeah? Well, you know, that’s just like, your opinion, man.”
• “You want a toe? I can get you a toe. There are ways, dude. You don’t want to know about them, believe me. Hell, I can get you a toe by three o’clock this afternoon—with nail polish.”
• “Calmer than you are.”
• “Give me the ringer, chop, chop.”
• “Man, come on, I had a rough night and I hate the fucking Eagles, man.”
• “Don’t be fatuous, Jeffrey.”
• “Phone’s ringin’, Dude.”
• “The Dude abides”

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Fess up. If you are of a certain age, there was a period in the mid ‘90s where you and your friends spoke exclusively in Tarantino dialogue. Ain’t nothing wrong with that, daddy-o.

• “Garçon means boy.”
• “And you will know my name is the Lord, when I lay my vengeance upon thee.”
• “Truth is nobody knows why Marsellus threw Tony out of that four-story window, except Marsellus and Tony. But when you little scamps get together, you’re worse than a sewing circle.”
• “I don’t know you. Who is this? Don’t come here. I’m hanging up the phone. Prank caller. Prank caller!”
• “I’m an American, honey, our names don’t mean shit.”
• “You hear me talkin’, hillbilly boy? I ain’t through with you by a damn sight. I’m gonna get medieval on your ass.”
• “Zed’s dead, baby. Zed’s dead.”
• “I’m a mushroom cloud layin’ motherfucker, motherfucker.”
• “Come on, Yolanda, what’s Fonzie like?”
• “I’m trying, Ringo, I’m trying real hard to be the shepherd.”

The Social Network (2010)

Aaron Sorkin is some sort of modern day bard, deftly molding dialogue with a near-lyrical quality. Add David Fincher’s crisp direction and Jesse Eisenberg’s merciless delivery and you almost feel a little goodwill towards Facebook. Almost.

• “You are going to go through life thinking girls don’t like you because you’re a nerd. And want you to know from the bottom of my heart, that that won’t be true. It’ll be because you’re an asshole.”
• “You have part of my attention. You have the minimum amount.”
• “If you guys were the inventors of Facebook, you would’ve invented Facebook.”
• “I’m talking about taking the entire social experience of college and putting it online.”
• “A million dollars isn’t cool. You know what’s cool? A billion dollars.”
• “Let the hacking begin.”
• “You better lawyer up, asshole. ‘Cause I’m not coming back for 30 percent. I’m coming back for everything.”
• “I’m six foot five, 220, and there’s two of me.”
• “You’re not an asshole Mark, you’re just trying so hard to be.”

A Christmas Story (1983)

When a package arrives at your door marked fragile… When a kid plays with something potentially dangerous… When there’s a frozen metal post just waiting to be licked… You know what to say, thanks to Ralphie and his nostalgic look back at his very best Xmas. 

• “You’ll shoot yer eye out!”
• “Frajeelay…must be Italian.”
• “Sons of Bitches! Bumbasses!”
• “The word. The big one. The queen-mother of dirty words. The F dash dash dash word.”
• “He looks like a deranged Easter bunny. He looks like a pink nightmare.”
• “You used up all the glue on purpose!”
• “He had yellow eyes! So help me, God! Yellow eyes!”
• “It was…soap poisoning!”
• “Daddy’s gonna kill Ralphie!”

The Princess Bride (1987)

If you want to get into screenwriting, you’re obligated to read at least five Willliam Goldman scripts and then his book Adventures in the Screen Trade. Endlessly rewatchable, we’ve all seen Westley save Buttercup too many times to count. And will do so again.    

• “As you wish!”
• “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”
• “You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.”
• “Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.”
• “Drop. Your. Sword.”
• “Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!”
• “That does put a damper on our relationship.”
• “Anybody wanna peanut?”
• “You seem a decent fellow… I hate to die.”
• “I want my father back, you son of a bitch!”
• “Inconceivable!”

Fargo (1996)

It was so comforting when everyone was saying, “Oh, dontcha know?” in our best Minnesota nice. The Coen brothers started with the accent and built a magnificently epic crime story from there. 

• “Oh, yah!”
• “Oh, he was a little guy… Kinda funny lookin’.”
• “Oh, for Pete’s sake, he’s fleeing the interview. He’s fleeing the interview!”
• “I’m not gonna debate you, Jerry, I’m not gonna sit here and debate.”
• “Yeah, ya fuckin’ mute!”
• “You were such a super lady.”
• “Tan Ciera! Tan Ciera!”
• “Just keep it still back there, lady, or we’re going to have to, you know, shoot you.”
• “Geez, well…geez. That’s a surprise!”
• “Just think I’m gonna barf… Well, that passed. Now I’m hungry again.”
• “There’s more to life than a little money, you know. Don’tcha know that? And here you are, and it’s a beautiful day.”

Dr. Strangelove (1964) 

Kubrick intended to make a nail-biting Cold War drama about nuclear weapons, but saw the inherent absurdity of “assured mutual destruction.” Thanks to that, we got this, one of the finest satires ever put to celluloid. 

• “Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here! This is the War Room!”
• “Mein Führer! I can walk!”
• “He went and did a silly thing. Well, I’ll tell you what he did. He ordered his planes… to attack your country.”
• “You can’t let him in here. He’ll see everything. He’ll see the big board!”
• “Shoot, a fella’ could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff.”
• “Dmitri! Don’t say that you’re more sorry than I am, because I’m capable of being just as sorry as you are.”
• “I can no longer sit back and allow communist infiltration, communist indoctrination, communist subversion and the international communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.”
• “I must confess, you have an astonishingly good idea there, Doctor.”
• “Gee, I wish we had one of them doomsday machines.”
• “Well, I don’t think it’s quite fair to condemn a whole program because of a single slip-up, sir.”

Spaceballs (1987)

Mel Brooks is the grandfather of one-liners. While Young Frankenstein is no doubt his masterpiece, nothing combines the cheese and hilarity quite like his sendup of Star Wars,  a franchise that was big then, big now, and always worthy of a good riffing.  

• “I’m surrounded by assholes!”
• “What’s the matter, Colonel Sandurz? Chicken?”
• “Spaceballs? Oh, shit. There goes the planet.”
• “Man, we ain’t found shit!”
• “No sir! I didn’t see you playing with your dolls again!”
• “You have the ring, and I see your Schwartz is as big as mine.”
• “I can’t breathe in this thing!”
• “I don’t know what to do. I can’t make decisions. I’m a president!”
• “So, Lone Starr, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.”
• “They’ve gone to plaid!”

Step Brothers (2008)

Put Will Farrell in front of the camera and the good lines take care of themselves. Add John C. Reilly to the mix, then ask them both to basically embody 12-year-olds, and you can give up hope of keeping a straight face for the next 98 minutes. 

• “Did we just become best friends?”
• “So many activities!” 
• “Oprah, Barbara Walters, your wife. You gotta fuck one, marry one, kill one. Go!”
• “Dane Cook, pay-per-view, 20 minutes, let’s go!” 
• “I’m fucking miserable. I had to get up at 10 o’clock this morning.” 
• “I’m Dale, but you have to call me Dragon.” 
• “Brennan, that is the voice of an angel. Brennan I can’t even make eye contact with you right now. Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.” 
• “It’s the fucking Catalina Wine Mixer.” 
• “I remember my first beer.” 
• “Don’t touch my drum set!” 

Reservoir Dogs (1992)

Dollars to donuts, three out of five screenwriters working today were inspired to hit the keyboard after seeing Tarantino’s debut effort. Tracing a bloody line from the dizzyingly good diner scene to the deliciously fraught standoff in the warehouse, Reservoir Dogs is Good Dialogue 101. 

• “You wanna know what ‘Like a Virgin’ is about?”
• “You shoot me in a dream, you better wake up and apologize.”
• “I bet you’re a big Lee Marvin fan, aren’t you?”
• “I’m hungry, let’s get a taco.”
• “Are you gonna bark all day little doggie? Or are you gonna bite?”
• “No way. Tried it once, doesn’t work. You get four guys all fighting over who’s gonna be Mr. Black, but they don’t know each other, so nobody wants to back down. No way. I pick. You’re Mr. Pink.”
• “I don’t wanna kill anybody. But if I got to get out that door, and you’re standing in my way, one way or the other, you’re gettin’ out of my way.”
• “You ever listen to K-Billy’s ‘Super Sounds of the Seventies’ weekend?”
• “And this non-college bullshit? I got two words for that: learn to fucking type.”
• “I didn’t create the situation, I’m just dealing with it. You’re acting like a first year fucking theif. I’m acting like a professional!”

Office Space  (1999)

When a boss asks you to work late or wants some pencil-pushing, inconsequential bit of busywork that has no bearing on life as we know it, Office Space speaks to you. We too want to annihilate the printer. We too want to just not show up.  

• “Ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it.”
• “No way! Why should I change? He’s the one who sucks.”
• “I don’t like my job, and… I don’t think I’m gonna go anymore.”
• “I’m gonna need you to go ahead and come in tomorrow. So if you could be here around nine that would be great.”
• “The ratio of people to cake is too big.”
• “I can’t believe what a bunch of nerds we are. We’re looking up ‘money laundering’ in a dictionary.”
• “It’s not okay because if they take my stapler then I’ll set the building on fire.”
• “We’re not going to white-collar resort prison! No, no, no. We’re going to federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison!”
• “I was told that I could listen to the radio at a reasonable volume.”
• “No! Not again! Why does it say paper jam when there is no paper jam?!”
• “Fuckin’ A.”

So I Married an Axe Murderer (1993)

Admittedly, Austin Powers is Mike Myers’ most oft-quoted vehicle, but we wanted to include his earlier turn as a Bay Area beat poet (a viable career in the ‘90s apparently) for the way it showcases his word brilliance unvarnished by costume. 

• “HEAD! PANTS! NOW!”
• “I think most Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.”
• “My name is John Johnson but everyone here calls me Vicki.”
• “Oh yeah! Yes, yes! I’m insensitive! I’m a very insensitive man! Stop your job, look at the insensitive man!”
• “Aw man, I was having an amazing dream. I was just born, and I was eight and half months premature. The doctors were freakin’ out.”
• “That boy’s head is like Sputnik—spherical yet quite pointy at parts. That was offside, wasn’t it? He’ll be crying himself to sleep tonight on his huge pillow.”
• “Hey paisan! You screw up one more time, I’m going to kick your spaghetti-bending butt back to Milan!”
• “Well, I don’t know, Tony, we haven’t reached that all-too-critical, ‘Do you know the words to “Only You”?’ phase in our relationship.”
• “Let’s get pissed!”

Deadpool (2016)

With every new world-dominating title, Marvel movies are begging for mockery. The fact that the (so, so naughty) lambasting is served up by one of its own—in a film that still manages to hit every superhero movie mark—is pure kismet.  

• “Superhero landing! She’s going to do a superhero landing!”
• “Whose balls did I have to fondle to get my very own movie? I can’t tell you. But it does rhyme with Polverine.”
• “I wasn’t talking to you. I was talking to them.”
• “You may be wondering why the red suit. Well that’s so bad guys can’t see me bleed. This guy’s got the right idea—he wore the brown pants.”
• “I also buried 1,600 kilos of cocaine somewhere in the apartment, right next to the cure for blindness. Good luck.”
• “You’re about to be killed by a Zamboni.”
• “It’s funny that I only ever see two of you. It’s almost like the studio couldn’t afford another X-Man.”
• “And please don’t make the super suit green. Or animated!”
• “I’m about to do to you what Limp Bizkit did to music in the late ‘90s.”
• “Fourth wall break inside a fourth wall break. That’s like, 16 walls.”

Napoleon Dynamite (2004)

We can thank Napoleon for introducing us to a whole new way of expressing lazy irritation—and for opening our eyes to the best place to keep tots.  

• “Tina! Eat the food! EAT THE FOOD!”
• “Your mom goes to college.”
• “But my lips hurt real bad!”
• “After one week with me in my dojo, you’ll be prepared to defend yourself with the strength of a grizzly, the reflexes of a puma, and the wisdom of a man.”
• “Vote for me, and all your wildest dreams will come true.”
• “This one gang kept wanting me to join because I’m pretty good with a bo staff.”
• “Why don’t you go eat a decroded piece of crap!”
• “Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills.”
• “Do the chickens have large talons?”

In the Loop (2009)

Like Ian McShane’s brothel owner in Deadwood, Peter Capaldi’s communications director elevates foul language to Shakespearean levels. If you need a novel way to insult someone, you can nae do better.  

• “You sounded like a Nazi Julie Andrews.”
• “Yeah, apparently, your fucking master race of highly-gifted toddlers can’t quite get the job done.”
• “Ok, fuckity bye!”
• “I haven’t got any thoughts. I’m just staring vacantly into space while a distant voice in the back of my head goes, ‘Oh, shit.’ like a car alarm in the night.”
• “I can’t stand to see a woman bleed from the mouth. It reminds me of that country & western music which I cannot abide.”
• “At the end of a war you need some soldiers left, really, or else it looks like you lost.”
• “Go fuck yourself, Frodo.”
• “I am calm! I am fookin ZEN!”
• “I will marshal all the forces of darkness to hound you into an assisted suicide.”
• “A walrus? I’m not fat, I don’t even have a mustache. Fuck, they’ve given me tusks.”

Beetlejuice (1988)

Between Cathrine O’Hara’s neurosis, Winona Ryder’s gothy-ness, and Michael Keaton’s insanity, the quotable lines flow like water under the Winter River bridge. 

• “I myself am strange and unusual.”
• “I’m the ghost with the most, babe.”
• “I’ve seen the Exorcist about a hundred and sixty-seven times, and it keeps getting funnier every single time I see it! Not to mention the fact that you’re talking to a dead guy! Now what do you think? You think I’m qualified?”
• “Nice fuckin’ model!”
• “Never trust the living.”
• “We’ve come for your daughter, Chuck.”
• “Hey, this might be a good look for me.”
• “Learn to throw your voice! Fool your friends! Fun at parties!”
• “Oh, look, an indoor outhouse.”
• “*That* is why I won’t do two shows a night anymore, babe, I won’t. I won’t do ‘em”

The Shining (1980)

TIL that Jack Nicolson improvised the line he says when he smashes through the bathroom door. Also? The crew had to replace the prop door with a real one thanks to Nicholson’s experience as a volunteer firefighter and his adeptness with an axe.  

• “Heeeeeeere’s Johnny!”
• “Come and play with us, Danny.”
• “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”
• “Red rum!”
• “Indeed he is, Mr. Torrance. A very willful boy. A rather naughty boy, if I may be so bold, sir.”
• “How’d you like some ice cream, Doc?”
• “We got a very serious problem with the people taking care of the place. They turned out to be completely unreliable assholes.”
• “I’m sorry to differ with you sir, but you are the caretaker. You’ve always been the caretaker.”
• “Great party, isn’t it?”

High Fidelity (2000)

For a real hoot, watch the short-lived 2020 Hulu adaptation of the same name. They replaced John Cusack’s character with one played by Zoë Kravitz, who is the daughter of Lisa Bonet, portrayer of  one of the love interests in the original film. Trippy. 

• “Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?”
• “I hired these guys for three days a week and they just started showing up every day.”
• “Frankly speaking, I’ve come to the conclusion that my guts have shit for brains.”
• “It was like trying to borrow a dollar, getting turned down, and asking for 50 grand instead.”
• “I will now sell five copies of The Three EPs by The Beta Band.”
• “I’m telling you this for your own good, that’s the worst fuckin’ sweater I’ve ever seen, that’s a Cosby sweater. A Cooooosssby sweater!”
• “Charlie, you fucking bitch. Let’s work it out!”
• “You pathetic rebound fuck! Now get your patchouli stink outta my store!”
• “Do we look like the kind of store that sells ‘I Just Called to Say I Love You’? Go to the mall.”
• “What…fucking…IAN GUY?!”

Glengarry Glen Ross (1992)

David Mamet sure can write a scene, a fact painfully evident in this play-turned-screenplay. The filmed version added Alec Baldwin’s character, to the glee of anyone who loves a proper burn. 

• “Always be closing.”
• “Put that coffee down! Coffee’s for closers only.”
• “Fuck you. That’s my name!”
• “You want to know what it takes to sell real estate? It takes brass balls to sell real estate.”
• “You never open your mouth until you know what the shot is.”
• “Who ever told you that you could work with men?”
• “You’ve got a big mouth… now I’m gonna show you an even bigger one.”
• “Will you go to lunch? Go to lunch. WILL you GO to LUNCH?”
• “Cop couldn’t find his dick with two hands and a map.”
• “They’re crazy. They just like talking to salesmen.”

Zoolander (2001)

We had no way of knowing an orange mocha frappuccino would actually become a thing, or that at one point or another, we’d all practice Blue Steel in the mirror (admit it). That’s just the influential power of male models. 

• “What is this! A center for ants?”
• “It’s that damn Hansel. He’s so hot right now!”
• “I’m pretty sure there’s a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking, and I plan on finding out what that is.”
• “They’re the same face! Doesn’t anybody notice this? I feel like I’m taking crazy pills!”
• “But…why male models?”
• “You think you’re too cool for school, but I got a newsflash for you, Walter Cronkite…you aren’t.”
• “Who you tryin’ to get crazy with, esse? Don’t you know I’m loco?”
• “Did you think I was too stupid to know what a eugoogooly was?”
• “Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features, doesn’t mean we too can’t not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.”
• “Dear God. It’s beautiful.”

Die Hard (1988)

Before Die Hard, Bruce Willis starred in the TV dramedy, Moonlighting. The dividing line between TV actors and movie stars was firmly drawn back then—casting him was a bold move. Yet no one else could have saved Nakatomi Plaza with quite so much irreverence. 

• “Son of a bitch. Fists with your toes.”
• “Hey babe, I negotiate million dollar deals for breakfast. I think I can handle this Eurotrash.”
• “That was Gary Cooper, asshole.”
• “Just a fly in the ointment, Hans. The monkey in the wrench. The pain in the ass.”
• “You know my name but who are you? Just another American who saw too many movies as a child? Another orphan of a bankrupt culture who thinks he’s John Wayne? Rambo? Marshal Dillon?”
• “Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker.”
• “Now I know what a TV dinner feels like.”
• “Quit being a part of the fucking problem and put the other guy back on!”
• “Got invited to the Christmas party by mistake.”
• “I am an exceptional thief, Mrs. McClane. And since I’m moving up to kidnapping, you should be more polite.”

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)

If you crunch your caramel corn too loudly, you’ll miss one of the ten thousand zingers flung between RDJ’s petty thief and Val Kilmer’s private detective as they solve a seedy noir mystery in a highly funny way. Maybe opt for Red Vines. 

• “Talking monkey. Yeah. Yeah, came here from the future. Ugly sucker. Only says, ‘ficus.’”
• “Go. Sleep badly. Any questions, hesitate to call.”
• “No, my question. I get to go first. Why in pluperfect hell would you pee on a corpse? 
• “No, I think he means that when you say picture it inside your head, OK, is that a bullet will be inside your head or picture it in your head like form an image. He’s got a point.”
• “Eight percent? Eight? Who taught you math!?”
• “Look up ‘idiot’ in the dictionary, you know what you’ll find?”/“A picture of me?”/“No! The definition of the word idiot, which you fucking are!”
• “You feel bad. Badly is an adverb, so to say you feel badly is to say that the mechanism which allows you to feel is broken.” 
• “I mean it’s literally like someone took America by the East Coast and shook it and all the normal girls managed to hang on.”
• “OK. You’ve got thirty of my fucking seconds. Thrill me.”

Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Get this: Hannibal Lector has a drawing in his cell when he first meets Clarice Starling. He tells her it’s a drawing of the Duomo as seen from the Belvedere. And where does Starling find Buffalo Bill? Belvedere, Ohio. Coincidence? That’s not Lector’s style. 

• “A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.”
• “It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again.”
• “Quid pro quo. I tell you things, you tell me things.”
• “People will say we’re in love.”
• “You could only dream of getting out, getting anywhere, getting all the way to the F.B.I.”
• “And senator, just one more thing. Love your suit.”
• “Well, Clarice. Have the lambs stopped screaming?”
• “I have no plans to call on your Clarice, the world is more interesting with you in it.”
• “I’m having an old friend for dinner.”

Casablanca (1942)

Your dad quotes this movie. So did your grandma. No one drops a line like Humphrey Bogart and almost no one has come close since. Of all the lines in all the films in all the world, Casablanca’s are the best. 

• “Play it Sam. Play, ‘As Time Goes By.’”
• “Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.”
• “Will I see you tonight?” / “I never make plans that far ahead.”
• “You played it for her, you can play it for me. If she can stand it I can.”
• “Go ahead and shoot. You’ll be doing me a favor.”
• “If that plane leaves the ground and you’re not with him, you’ll regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life.”
• “I’m no good at being noble, but it doesn’t take much to see that the problems of three little people don’t amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world.” 
• “We’ll always have Paris.”
• “Major Strasser has been shot. Round up the usual suspects.”
• “Louie, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”